These are the words typically used to describe Xivitan Andrix, a Grigacian and former Time Agent turned criminal. How he came to this life after being a respectable member of the Time Agency is still a whirlwind of jumbled thoughts and faded memories. But Xiv would not have it any other way.
“Give me the clothes on my back, a handful of credits from the pockets of that gent over there and a ship to steal away on, and life is alright by me.”
However, despite his bravado and charm, Xivitan is constantly paranoid and always on the lookout for the truth to his current state of being. All he recalls is waking up one day in a cold cell in the Stormcage Containment Facility. He had no recollection of what had transpired and even less when he was eventually granted an audience with his former partner to explain his crimes.
He was shown a video clip from a security camera of a high ranking government official on Epsillicus 5. There he saw himself standing over the body of dead government official, a smoking blaster in one hand and The Star of Pandrica (A diamond as large as the fist of a Yeti and most likely owned by said dead official) in the other. He denied ever taking part in these crimes, having no recollection of these events. But despite his pleas of innocence, he was locked way in The Stormcage as the evidence does not lie.
Before he left, Xiv’s partner paid him one last visit in his cell, thanking him for acquiring the Star and helping him and his partners out. Realizing he had somehow been double crossed, Xiv swore he would find a way out of prison and get his revenge.
And escape he did. Although details of this escape are usually quite sketchy and Xiv’s story tends to change every time he tells it. Usually it starts off with:
“There I was. Locked away in the one of the most fortified prisons in the 52nd century with nothin but my wits, my smile, and the clothes on my back…”
From there, the tale varies, one time involving him using his clothing as an escape tool and fleeing prison naked in the back of a female guards hovercar and another involving a toothpick, a lasercutter, and 6 pounds of grease. However the tale, Xiv was able to escape and, in the process, reclaim his Vortex Manipulator, held there as evidence. Unfortunately, it seems his former partner had tampered with the device before turning it over, rendering it’s ability to travel in time problematic at best (when it does work, he cannot seem to control it).
Despite his predicament, Xiv began wandering the stars, a wanted man by the galactic authorities and the Time Agency (He is unaware of it being disbanded). Since his escape, he has hooked up with a number of unsavory characters in several different eras (If a criminal they label me, then a criminal I shall be) including one Sabalom Glitz. From Glitz he learned about The Doctor, an outlaw Timelord from Gallifrey and the one man Xiv believed might be able to repair his manipulator.
However, his search for The Doctor led him to someone a little less inclined to aid the crook. During one of his attempted time jumps, Xiv appeared in the pool of The Professor’s TARDIS, unsure of where he was, he caused quite a commotion for The Professor, Michael and Lucy before being caught and questioned. Realizing he was not much of a threat (in part thanks to his glib tongue), they released him and he travelled with them for a short time before an incident on the planet of a rather advanced civilization involving Xiv, the ruling leader’s daughter, and a golden sphere said to contain the power of a sun that belonged to the royal family.
Xiv claimed innocence but eventually the truth came out and The Professor left Xiv to the mercies of the planet’s authorities. However, escape from their jail was child’s play (thanks, in part, to the help given by the leader’s daughter), and Xiv once more took to the stars. He would encounter The Professor several more times, some of which involuntarily as use of the Vortex Manipulator usually seems to pull him back to the TARDIS, much to the chagrin of its owner.
So, for now, Xiv travels the stars, currently with The Professor once more, seeking the truth and his fortune.
Story Points: 8